Do you think this is a joke is funny?

Monday
It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The
recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

Tuesday
Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper

Wednesday
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can’t say it improved the rice any.

Thursday
Today Tom asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden..

Friday
I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

Saturday
Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don’t have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.

Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius.. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.
Do you think this is a joke is funny?
I meant to say
Do you think this joke is funny?

I’m 12 years old and overweight. Please help me a d tell me a diet. PLEASE HELP i’m desperate?

Hi I’m 12 years old, 5 2″ tall and i weigh 115 lbs, I’m overweight and it always brings me down. I really want to lose at least 20 lbs it doesnt need to be quick but i want it to be lost by october/november this year. So i wanted to know an easy free diet that i could do at home with out joining or buying anypills or diet shakes, without my parents knowing, i’m a pretty good cook so recipes wouldnt be a problem, i tried bulimia a while ago and i lost about 27 lbs but it made me feel really deppresses and sick so i stopped and i put all the weight back on. I would really really really appreciate if you could tell me a diet. Thanx xx

Best recipes for post-delivery?

What foods do you cook for a semi-vegetarian new mom post-delivery? She’s open to taking broiled/roasted meats and fish which are easier to prepare, fresh fruits and vegetables are excellent, but I see no reading on dairy (which seems like it could help a lot) and I’m also reading that no diet helps relieve post-delivery fatigue.

In general I’m trying to plan a menu free of casseroles or similar highly-processed foods.

I used to cook for elderlies in their homes and I cooked mostly Mediterranean-centred diets (e.g. baked fish, olive oil+vinegar, boiled veggies, pimenta for the odd stir fry, etc.) But this woman is Korean, likes her kimchi and her seaweed soup (which I can prepare) though she likes some western dishes.I wonder if traditional comfort foods (kimchi stews, stir-fry dishes with loads of pickled veggie side dishes) is the way to go or high-energy low- or unprocessed foods is better (i.e. western-style roasted chicken and veggies, hearty western stews, etc.)

What should I pack for lunch for my camp?

Well I go to a theater camp every day. It os very active and full of energy, and by the time the camp is done, you’re extremely tired. Well I don’t bring lunch from home, I eat what they serve, and it is really nasty food. Well I need to know what to pack for lunch. I don’t have like deli meats at home or any type of meat that is not cooked with gravy and used for dinner. Well, what should I bring for lunch to camp? The camp is 5 hours and I need a heavy filling lunch that will give me energy.What should I pack? And what are some good easy healthy recipes that 12 year olds can make? Thanks a bunch!

The local Blonde Diary.?

Monday:
It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors loaned me the extra bowls.

Tuesday:
Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home to dinner and they found me naked!

Wednesday:
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice so I took a bath. Can’t say it helped the rice.

Thursday:
Tried a new salad recipe. It said “prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.” Tom asked why I was rolling around the garden.

Friday:
Found easy recipe for cookies that said “put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it.” Something went wrong. When I got home, everything was just as I left it.

Saturday:
Tom went shopping today, brought home a chicken, and asked me to dress it for Sunday. I didn’t have any clothes that fit it. For some reason, Tom keeps counting to ten.

Sunday: Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly, I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. How disappointing. When it came out, it was still hamburger!

Goodnight, dear diary. Tomorrow I’m gonna buy a bigger oven so I can fix Tom a chocolate moose!

Another blonde joke……..

The Blonde Bride’s Kitchen Diary

Monday:
It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors loaned me the extra bowls.

Tuesday:
Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home to dinner and they found me naked!

Wednesday:
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice so I took a bath. Can’t say it helped the rice.

Thursday:
Tried a new salad recipe. It said “prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.” Tom asked why I was rolling around the garden.

Friday:
Found easy recipe for cookies that said “put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it.” Something went wrong. When I got home, everything was just as I left it.

Saturday:
Tom went shopping today, brought home a chicken, and asked me to dress it for Sunday. I didn’t have any clothes that fit it. For some reason, Tom keeps counting to ten.

Sunday: Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly, I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. How disappointing. When it came out, it was still hamburger!

Goodnight, dear diary. Tomorrow I’m gonna buy a bigger oven so I can fix Tom a chocolate moose!.

and here is da second part….plz help….?

heres the second part of the essay…plz help…suggestions will be taken into consideration…corrections….thanks

If fast food chains were to be banned, people still have the option of buying junk and fatty foods from supermarkets, school and workplace canteens, milk bars, vending machines, restaurants, convenient stores and many other places. Alternatively, they could just buy the ingredients needed for the recipe and make a fatty cheeseburger and chips at home. So banning fast food chains has no affect on obesity levels because people can still add a lot of oils and sugars to their foods at home. Especially homes with children, if the parents are not careful with what they feed their children, the children may be put at risk of developing obesity at a later stage in life. A child’s food decisions are highly influenced by what they see on television, in their homes, at school, in the media and by what they see as good food. Therefore, when the children are not around their parents or are at a place like school, they would be able to buy junk foods from the canteen. This is why it is so important for children to be educated about unhealthy foods and healthy foods at an early age to help them develop good eating habits. Consequently, people may already addicted to fast food and it may be difficult for them to avoid these foods, so they buy these foods at other stores that are not banned.

Prohibiting fast foods and fast food chains could increase the cravings of consumers who have already been addicted. People who try to quit smoking find it hard to give up the addictive substance, nicotine, so they just keep smoking because they are forcing themselves into thinking that they cannot have a smoke, which makes them want to smoke even more. Similarly, banning fast food chains will not stop people from buying or making these foods, they will find substitutes and consume them instead. In other words, if they cannot get their junk foods from a chain such as McDonalds, they will find another meal or pre-pared meal filled with oils, fats, preservatives and chemicals. Overall, if fast food chains are to be banned, it would just make consumers want it even more and there would be no differences because consumers will be continually trying to substitute in other fatty foods.

However, if fast food chains were to be banned, people would not have the chance to see advertisements or fast food restaurants, so they would not want it as much. In addition, people would learn not to eat fast food because it is not available to them and they would need to buy or cook their own food. This would be a healthier option because most fast foods contain high levels of sugar, fat, salt and preservatives, whereas home cooked meals would contain less sugars and fats and more nutrients and vitamins. For example, if you compare a Big Mac with homemade stir-fry, you can instantly see the difference. A Big Mac has two meat patties, mayonnaise, cheese and a couple of pieces of lettuce, but a stir-fry has a variety of vegetables, some meat and maybe some rice. Eventually, fast food will phase out and people will just learn to choose healthier options, but it may not be that easy or simple, it all starts with a good education on healthy and unhealthy foods.

To sum up, banning fast food chains will not necessarily reduce the obesity levels. There are other factors that contribute to obesity, such as the advancement of technology and little vigorous physical activity. There is not point enforcing a fast food ban when there are still supermarkets and milk bars that sell junk food, it is not as if the government can ban all stores of selling junk food, it would be too difficult, time consuming and money wasting. The money could go to more worthy causes such as education on this topic. Obesity levels probably will not change because people would still want their fatty foods and will try to substitute it with other junk foods. I believe that a ban on fast food chains such as McDonalds and KFC will not work, at the end of the day, it is the consumers’ choice to eat these types of foods.

One of my great contacts sent me this,is it funny or what?”No offense intended”?

BLOND COOKBOOK;
[Monday]It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

[Tuesday] Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper.

[Wednesday] A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can’t say it improved the rice any.

[Thursday] Today Tom asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden..

[Friday] I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

********* Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don’t have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.

[Sunday] Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.

From the Diary of a Blonde – Joke!!!!! Star if you like?

MONDAY

It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.

TUESDAY

Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper.

WEDNESDAY

A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can’t say it improved the rice any.

THURSDAY

Today Tom asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden.

FRIDAY

I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.

SATURDAY

Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don’t have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.

SUNDAY

Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius.. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————–

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.

How often do you use a cookbook?

The Blondes Cookbook

Monday
It’s fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me the extra bowls.

Tuesday
He wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when he brought a friend home for supper

Wednesday
A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can’t say it improved the rice any.

Thursday
Today he asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Asked me why I was rolling around in the garden..

Friday
I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it.. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left..

Saturday
He did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don’t have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason he keeps counting to ten.

Sunday
I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius..I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.

GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe. If I can talk him into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.